


The Lonely Hours

by sharedwithyou



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Iron Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Based on Bucky's Real Life Adventures, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, No mindfucks for once!!, Reader-Insert, Well maybe a small one, the title is misleading
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-20
Updated: 2015-08-20
Packaged: 2018-04-16 07:30:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4616652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharedwithyou/pseuds/sharedwithyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not inspired by The Lonely Hours- Sarah Vaughan, although it is an amazing song</p><p>“Eek!!!!!!”</p><p>“…Tony?!” You peered out of the doorway to your room, worried. </p><p>“Nothing to see here, everything fine- Clint get out!!” You heard Tony exclaiming as you pondered kicking the door in. But you had just gotten these boots; Tony had puked on the others when Pepper had broken up with him last month. And these were nice. Steve Madden with real leather. You had definitely laid on the sentimental value of the last pair to the alcoholic. Not that he didn’t deserve it. Or couldn’t afford it. </p><p>“CLINT!!” You screamed over Tony’s blustering, and the archer made his way to your door. “Let me out!!”</p><p>“Uh, I think I’m sticking with Tony this time.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Lonely Hours

**Author's Note:**

> yup no angsty angst here. just good ole fashioned fun and ribbing.
> 
> although i do love the lonely hours by sarah vaughan, this title was actually inspired by a funny story about bucky the mindfucker herself. 
> 
> might make an angsty fic actually inspired by that song now that i think of it...
> 
> but since i've posted so much heartbreak, some cute fun is in store!!
> 
> mini-mindfuck- the title, i guess? ;) well you'll see anyway
> 
> give me some love if you liked!!

“Eek!!!!!!”

 

“…Tony?!” You peered out of the doorway to your room, worried.

 

“Nothing!! Don’t come in!!” He rushed over and slammed the door in your face.

 

“What the- TONY!” You turned the knob, but something very heavy was keeping it closed. “You need to lose weight fatty!!”

 

“Hey!!” He complained before dragging something vaguely chair-sounding over and jamming your door with it.

 

“The fuck is wrong with you?!” You pounded loudly but Tony whistled loudly, pretending not to hear. “Tony!!!” You could practically hear his smirk.

 

That is until another scream came. “EEEE!!”

 

“TONY!!” This time he sounded genuinely scared, and you were feeling a little worried. The last time you had heard him make this sound was when Clint caught him trying to install a camera in the bathroom you and Nat the Cat shared. The Brunette Hawky Hunk had just returned from a mission and was in a foul mood to begin with. Poor Tony had needed stitches.

 

Of course you hadn’t felt sorry for him then. Only later, when you found out Bruce hadn’t let him take any anesthetic.

 

The good old Avengers. They really had your backs; when they weren’t the ones who were screwing with you in the first place. Which was usually just Tony anyway.

 

“Nothing to see here, everything fine- Clint get out!!” You heard Tony exclaiming as you pondered kicking the door in. But you had just gotten these boots; Tony had puked on the others when Pepper had broken up with him last month. And these were nice. Steve Madden with real leather. You had definitely laid on the sentimental value of the last pair to the alcoholic. Not that he didn’t deserve it. Or couldn’t afford it.

 

“CLINT!!” You screamed over Tony’s blustering, and the archer made his way to your door. “Let me out!!”

 

“Uh, I think I’m sticking with Tony this time.”

 

“You- what?!”

 

“Out of love, babe!! Out of love!!” He assured as you heard a clang and some rustling. Coward was escaping through the vents- the vents!!

 

“Don’t even think about it!” A certain voice came from over your head before the sounds of a drill sounded out your cries. Asshole was bolting the opening down. You’d get him for this.

 

Since Clint had turned Eggs Benedict on you, it was time for drastic measures.

 

“Tony if you don’t let me out right this second I’m calling Nat!!”

 

“… you wouldn’t!!” There was a hurt gasp from billionaire playboy.

 

“I’m dialing right now!!”

 

“We’re supposed to have each others’ backs!!”

 

“And you barricaded me into my room like a psycho!”

 

“You are a psycho!!”

 

“Which is why we’re friends!! So let me out!!”

 

“Fat chance!!”

 

“Hey Nat-“

 

“NOOOO HANG UP!!” Tony screamed as he skidded over the floor with a bang; probably to remove whatever heavy thing was blocking you in and swung the door open.

 

“What’s hanging toots?”

 

“… you traitor.” Tony glared balefully at you as you held up your right hand in a hang ten sign. The universal hand phone.

 

“Says the guy who locked me in?!?!”

 

“It was for a good reason.”

 

“Oh?!?!”

 

“Yes.” Tony put a heavy hand on your shoulder and pointed dramatically at the kitchen floor across the way.

 

“Eww!!”

 

“That’s right, (y/n). And you only have yourself to blame.”

 

“About what?”

 

“Are you kidding me?!?!” He shook you by the shoulders as he yelled in your face. “I just killed a cockroach for you!!”

 

“Uhm…” You tapped his forehead to see if he was feverish; or if his brain was working. “Yeah that’s what I asked you to do in the first place.”

 

“…” Tony looked adorable with his confused face.

 

“Why else would I text you ‘I need my hero’? You know you’re my champion cockroach killer!”

 

“…right.” Tony slumped and went to get a broom.

 

“What’s going on Tony?” You followed him, also confused. He looked bummed, and it was cute, but something was afoot here. At least it wasn’t the cockroach. They scared you to bits.

 

“The hero strikes again!!” A voice cheered as it grappled down from the ceiling.

 

“I’m going to kick your ass Clint Barton-“

 

“Wait, no (y/n), tell her the full story Tony!!”

 

“…as soon as Tony tells me the full story! Whatever that is.”

 

“No thanks.” Tony moped in a dejected tone as he swept the dead cockroach in a pan and pulled out a Hefty garbage bag to dump it in.

 

“A whole bag for one bug?” Nat the Cat mused as she walked in.

 

“Hey, I didn’t see you stepping in to help.” Tony the Hero mumbled as he went to the nearest garbage chute. A second later, there was a sizzling sound.

 

“You’re not supposed to put plastic in the incinerator,” You chastised. All those fumes were bad for the environment!! And your brains. And you needed them, especially in this tower.

 

“Oh shove off!!” Tony fumed, before marching towards the elevator.

 

“Wait a minute- Tony!!” You called, frustrated and feeling completely out of the loop. You looked back at your assassin friends, but they shook their heads furiously and refused to make eye contact. Was everyone against you today?! “Hold that door then, weirdo!!”

 

In response, Iron Boy pushed the “Door Close” button furiously as you marched right after him.

 

“Better do it, or she’ll track you through the vents Stark.”

 

“She takes after you too much, HawkButt.”

 

Hawkbutt merely smirked and gave you a thumbs up, before starting a pointless argument with Nat. Ahh, besties.

 

 

“Well there’s 30 more floors to the roof, so we have plenty of time to go over why you’re acting weird.”

 

“I’m not acting weird.”

 

“I’m not acting weird,” you mimicked back, but for once he didn’t rise to the bait. “Woah there, Tony. I was just joking.”

 

“Whatever.” Tony folded his arms and checked his million-dollar watch stubbornly.

 

“Come on, you big hero,” you nudged, but he kept his sullen face silent. Maybe it was time to try a different tact.

 

“If you don’t tell me I’ll beat it out of you.”

 

“Be my guest,” he replied stoically. Well things were getting weird. Tony never got this bummed. Not even when he found out his favorite Bunny had turned 35.

 

“Well then, desperate times call for desperate measures.” You warned, but he just lifted an eyebrow in very bored curiosity.

 

So you jumped towards him and began pummeling him with your fingers.

 

 

“Ahh!!! Stop!!!”

 

“Not until you tell me what’s making you all fucked up!”

 

“I’m always fucked up!! Stop it AHAHA!!!”

 

“Stop ittt,” you mocked, before continuing your assault.

 

“I’m going to get you back!!”

 

“Nope, this is payback for putting me in room-jail earlier.”

 

“That was-ACK- that didn’t count!!”

 

“Keep talking Stark, and I’ll keep tickling.”

 

“You forget the treaty of ’07!!”

 

“Desperate times call for desperate measures,” you maintained calmly as you warded off his wiggling hands with one arm and continued torturing him with the other.

 

“Fine, FINE!!” Tony screamed as he tripped and fell flat on his face. You decided to sit on his back for good measure. “Uncle?”

 

“OOF!” Tony heaved a cramped sigh. “Uncle. Now get off.”

 

“Hmm,” you pondered as you stood up slightly. “Nah.” You sat back down, squishing him.

 

“Damnit (y/n)!!”

 

“I’ll get off as soon as you spill the beans.”

 

“That’s what she said!”

 

“Pff!!” It was hard to stay mad at him. Especially once he started to make you laugh. “Don’t think you can joke your way out of this one!!”

 

“Fine. Can you at least let me turn over so I don’t feel like I’m going to get buttsex.”

 

“What, you don’t like ass play?”

 

“NOT LIKE THIS.”

 

You roared in laughter as you got up momentarily so he could feel butt-safe.

 

“Why are we still in the elevator anyway? I’m rich as fuck, you’d think I could afford those speedyGonzalez ones.”

 

“You purposely got a slow one so you could have elevator sex with Pepper.” His eyes twinkled slightly before his face fell. “Sorry.”

 

“Nah it’s cool. I like the single life anyway.”

 

“Fits you just about right.” You assured him, being a good friend for about three seconds. “Now spill.”

 

“Ugh, fine.” He whined.

 

 

“I just didn’t want you to see me kill it.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“The cockroach.”

 

“…why the hell not?”

 

“I just didn’t feel like being watched okay?!”

 

“That’s what she said!” You burst out and you felt his chest rumble. It was nice. So was his disheveled hair and indignant look.

 

“It’s only funny when I say it,” he pouted, trying not to laugh.

 

“Stop being butthurt,” you chided. “You always find it funny. Just like I always see you kill those horrible things.”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Nah.”

 

“Yeah!!” You guys were turning two again.

 

He sighed. “Think about it, (y/n).”

 

“I am!!”

 

“Have you ever actually seen me kill one? Like, in action?”

 

“…” you searched your crammed up brain. “Now that you mention it…”

 

“Yup.”

 

“You always find the electric fly swatter before me.”

 

“That never surprised you?”

 

“Of course not! You always put your things in weird places. The Bacardi in the medicine cabinet-“

 

“Rum IS my medicine!!”

 

“The emergency boxers in the fridge.”

 

“Duh, in case my nuts are ever set on fire.”

 

“…why- oh nevermind.” This was getting nowhere. You should probably go check on Clint anyway. Make sure he wasn’t getting killed by the Widow.

 

 

“Look,” he was speaking low now, so you sat back down in case he lost his nerve and tried to run away.

 

“Cockroaches… actually scare the crap out of me.”

 

“…” You looked at him bug-eyed. Hmm punny. Back to being surprised. “But-“

 

“I know, I always act all macho, but they make me shit my pants. Literally.”

 

“Should I go get the emergency-“

 

“Okay not literally. But almost.” A huge smile cracked over your face. It was Tony’s turn to look confused now.

 

“Why didn’t you just tell me? I would’ve just killed it myself.”

 

“…what?!” Tony sat up so suddenly, you slid off his chest. Who knew he had the abs for it. Even he himself looked surprised.

 

“Yeah, I would’ve done it. It’s just you always made such a big show of it, since I called you my hero the first time you did it.”

 

“You nearly pissed your pants that time!!”

 

“I know!!” You were agreeing with him now, and he looked like he was about to lose it. “But after that weekend Fury took me off duty for making out with Clint in that warehouse we were staking out and I had to sit in the tower all by myself, I found a cockroach stealing my butter pecan ice cream when I came back from the bathroom, and it was my movie night, and you know how I get on my movie night-“

 

“I do.” He shuddered, remembering your ritual of fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies a la mode, but with the mode on the side, two fluffy pillows, three quilts, one comforter, either soda or a milkshake, and a remote control that doubled as a projectile should anyone so much as think about speaking to you before the credits.

 

“Well after that, I kind of got done being scared. And got mad. Real mad.”

 

“Ahh.” All things were suddenly clear. “Wait, is that why you haven’t called the exterminator yet?!”

 

“…what are you talking about Buttface?! You said you’d call them two weeks ago!!”

 

“You know when I say I’ll do things it means I won’t do them and that someone needs to do them for me!!”

 

“Well that’s kind of Pepper’s job!” You bit your lip at the knee-jerk response, but he waved you away.

 

 

“I guess that kind of makes sense.” Tony nodded thoughtfully.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“’Cause a similar thing happened to me.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Well, I decided to prank someone with a fake cockroach, but at the last second someone out-pranked me and switched the fake one with a real one. Once you’ve held a live one in your hand, you just can’t go back.”

 

“That’s what she said.” You both laughed, and the air cooled, just like that.

 

 

You reached forward now. Tony was annoying, an ass, and completely devoid of all common sense; but he was your dumbass and you loved him anyway. You loved him for it.

 

“Don’t mess up my hair.”

 

“You know I’m going to.” You ran your fingers through it softly, before mushing it against his face.

 

“Damnit it (y/n).”

 

“You know you love me.”

 

“Nu uhhh.”

 

“Yu huhhh.”

 

“If I did, would I have put that cockroach in your ice cream?!”

 

“…”

 

“Oops.”

 

“ANTHONY HOWARD STARK!!”

 

“Yes?” He murmured meekly, with his best puppy eyes. You were not falling for them this time.

 

“That was you??!?!”

 

“Uhm… fifth amendment?”

 

“DENIED! And also; why were you even home?! I thought everyone was out on the mission.”

 

“Well uh; I kind of wanted to be alone with you.”

 

You were furious, but there was a weird sensation in you all of a sudden.

 

“So uh, I was the one who told Fury about you and Clint.”

 

“TONY!!”

 

“And then I convinced Clint to scram for the weekend-“  


“YOU UTTER IDIOT!!”

 

“But I guess he kind of held a grudge and switched out that fake cockroach for a real one. So uh, instead of being heroic and coming to your rescue and having hero-sex with you, I spent the weekend at the Marriot.”

 

“…” you had no words.

 

“And right now I’m kind of wishing I didn’t get this slow-ass elevator so I could be on the roof and call my suit to whisk me away.”

 

“You’re gonna be wishing a lot more soon.”

 

“I bet.” He covered his face with his hands. “Just not the face!! That’s my money-maker!!”

 

“I thought that was your ass!”

 

He merely whimpered in response.

 

Two whole minutes passed before he opened his eyes. 30 seconds before he removed his hands. “Aren’t you gonna-“

 

“Nope.”

 

“But you said-“

 

“Yep.”

 

“Then-“ He trailed off, more confused than he had been the hour before.

 

“Clint and I made up the rumor.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Yeah Clint had the kids that weekend, and as their Godmother I wanted to be there too.”

 

“But-“

 

“No one else knew about his family at that time, and all y’all thought we were together anyway, so it was the perfect cover.”

 

“I-“

 

“But since the kids got Chicken Pox and I never had it as a kid, I couldn’t spend that much time with them. Which was why I was back in time for my movie night.”

 

“…oh.”

 

“But if I had known you had all these grand delusions in your mind, I might have actually been game.”

 

“…what?!” Tony was suddenly very nervous in addition to frightened.

 

“Everyone in the tower figured out eventually that Clint and I could never be together. We’re too alike. He’s the annoying brother I never had and am glad I never actually had to grow up with.”

 

“Which left the only annoying asshole as… three guesses and the first two don’t count.”

 

“Hey I’m not a- wait…” His cheeks had turned pink, and for the first time in his life he looked unsure… or scared.

 

“Yeah I have a thing for annoying assholes. So hurry up and ask me out already.”

 

“…heh. Heh. Hehehe HAHAHAHAHA” A mixture of anxiety and joy bubbled out of Tony as he squished your cheeks. “I knew it!!”

 

“Bullshit, Tony. And we both know that so don’t even try to deny it.”

 

“Fine. But you always thought I was hot.”

 

“Agree to disagree.”

 

“Come on….”

 

“Fine. I’ll let you have that one. Since I already have the perfect punishment in mind.”

 

“Ooh, sexy.” And that was Tony Stark for you. “Give it to me babe.”

 

“Oh you bet I will.” Tony raised an eyebrow, more than slightly curious this time. “You see, even as the newbiest of agents, I have certain powers of observation.”

 

“Rightttt,” he teased.

 

“And you do realize that ever since you sat up, I slipped down from your stomach right?”

 

“…so?”

 

“Like right into your lap?”

 

“And?”

 

“Hmm.” Lights on but no one was home. Certain other things were also on. “Guess I’ll make it crystal clear for you.”

 

“You do that- OOF!!” Tony turned a mixture of red and purple as you bounced up and landed right back into his lap. “Uhm….”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“So….”

 

“So I am going to sit here until we reach the roof.”

 

“Sounds good to me,” he wiggled his eyebrows but you put a finger to his lips. Which made him wiggle them even more.

 

“And then I’m going to go parasailing with Clint.”

 

“…what?”

 

“And you can keep your blueballs until I come back. Or until I feel like fucking you. Whichever.”

 

 

“…no.”

 

“Oh yeah.”

 

“…oh God. No. Please-“

 

“You only brought this on yourself.” The elevator finally dinged and the doors opened to a beautiful sunset. And a couple of shocked faces.

 

“Uh-“ Steve covered his face, before realizing the two of you were fully clothed. His look of embarrassment turned to concern. “Oh no, (y/n), did you fall?”

 

Bucky nearly snorted in laughter as he reached out to pull you to your feet. “So the two of you decided to finally try elevator sex, huh?”

 

“He wishes,” You smirked as you high-fived the Winter Soldier. Meanwhile the SuperSoldier had decided covering his ears was more beneficial than his eyes.

 

“So you two are finally fucking huh?”

 

“Bucky!! Language!!”

 

“Nah. I’m gonna keep him blueballs until he’s on better behavior.”

 

“Atta girl.” Bucky squeezed your shoulder, before reaching a hand towards Tony.

 

“Ah, I think I’m pretty comfortable right here.” Tony spoke enigmatically, as he began spamming the door close button.

 

“Come on, don’t make us take the stairs.”

 

“I don’t think so,” Tony spoke firmly as Bucky pulled a confused Steve back.

 

“He’s going to need some time to himself.”

 

“Do I want to know?”

 

“No.” You and Bucky replied in unison.

 

 

“Attention, everyone.” Jarvis came in through the intercom. “There will be no masturbation allowed in the elevator for the perceivable future. That includes you, Master Stark.”

 

“I was just re-adjusting my belt!”

 

“OH GROSS!!!”

 

“Apologies, Master Rogers.”

**Author's Note:**

> TEEHEEEHEEE
> 
> BAD TONY IS BAD. BASHFUL TONY IS BAD. I LOVE TONY.  
> i definitely should write more tonylove since he is my fav avenger. sorry clint- you just don't have enough time on screen. i give you more life on paper than you get on screen ;)
> 
> leave a comment if you enjoyed!!
> 
> Random ramblings:
> 
> a similar thing happened to me and hubz with a deadly cockroach- I screamed and hid for about 10 minutes before getting mad and cornering it with a spray bottle and smushing it with our shitty flyswatter. the next week though, a cockroach ran across the floor 1 foot from my BARE FOOT while i was alone in the apartment, and the windex (my new cockroach poison that i came up with myself) was out of reach, so i freaked and turned on the light so it would hide, and then avoided the kitchen for the next hour. yup. 
> 
> also movie nights were a thing for me in high school. like big time. friday nights when the 'rents went on date night, i hogged the living room with my world-famous hot-out-of-the-oven chocolate chip cookies and a chick flick. no one else was allowed to watch with me. sounds bitchy, but a girl needs alone time you know?! especially when she's the youngest and therefore has to go to bed earliest and doesn't get to watch tv until the weekends. 
> 
> mini mindfuck includes not only the title but implied clintlove!!!
> 
> quick poll 1: when did you realize this was going to be a tony/lovely story?
> 
> quick poll 2: when did you realize what Tony's little indiscretion was?
> 
> quick poll 3: did Tony want to sit in the elevator alone so his raging boner would go down and he could stand again... or was he really taking care of business?!?!
> 
> props for a Jarvis cameo. 
> 
> small plot point that i decided to keep out for better dialogue flow- the bang right before Tony lets you out of the room is him squashing it. normally he has you look for the electric flyswatter; but really he just gets Jarvis to laser it for him before you come back. that way a burnt up bug makes sense when you come back. who knows if he even has an electric flyswatter? Clint figures this out, but decides to let Tony keep his secret for the day. which is why he turned Eggs Benedict. probably to make up for the cockroach incident and also giving Tony stitches.
> 
> protective Clint is love.
> 
> how cute is secretly scared Tony?!?!
> 
> things always get a little pervy when it's TonyTime. not that i mind ;)
> 
> that's all this time lovelies!! hope you loved it!!
> 
> XOXO Bucky (the mindfucker, not to be confused with Bucky the winter soldier)


End file.
